Today in summer we brushed knuckles with death and made friends with a waveless lake. I filled my heart with an old fashioned maple and floated on my back popping stiff joints under water because thats the closest mermaids get to fire crackers and I want them to know about the fourth of july.
There is a point of buoyancy when you stop thinking you might not be able to float any longer and trust the water and your body fat to keep you bobbing.
Up..... Down..... Up.
... Down.
Lulled by the ebbing waves of aquarobics and the slow, repetitive laps of flabby arms and side breaths.
Friday, March 29, 2013
Monday, March 25, 2013
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
"I can see my breath."
I suppose this can be the point in winter where the navel gazing recommences, because lawdy knows it is too damn cold for much else.
Our house is an icebox. Something about the hole in the ceiling that lets all the warm air escape, the single-paned windows, the lack of insulation in century old walls. Go figure. Try as we might with electric blankets, space heaters, fireball, winter coats, dancing, cuddles and literal house-warming parties of 40+ and soup, we just can't seem to get the place above 54 degrees. I am tempted to buy a pair of heat-vision goggles just to marvel at the lack of vision they would provide. Alas, this would be a waste of money that I do not have to phenomenize something that really just sucks. So for now, I just pretend to have said heat-vision goggles by closing my eyes because it seems to be the cheapest and most comparable alternative.
When you live in a house, you start to fill it up with useless items (see--many slug-covered couches in the basement, knicknackspaddywhacks, tchotchkes, do-hickys, randomcrap, junk, treasuretroves, wtf is this?! ). It is a well known fact. What is less well known is the fact that when you live in a dwelling, you start to take on the characteristics of said abode. Sort of like how married couples become indistinguishable after 60 years of marriage, or the way that people often resemble their pets.
Keeping in the same vein, it has recently come to my attention that just like Rayegrey, I too am in pursuit of warmth. I am in a season of patching windows and sealing doors and hanging thick drapes and insulating the walls because when it comes down to it I am literally and metaphorically tired of paying for heat that doesn't last. And yeah I want to be comfortable but some work has to be done first to insulate the extremities of this lovely wreck of a house.
This all involves--
Patience. Gah! Patience kills me. It involves lots of over-sized Saran wrap and hair-driers and contractors coming in and making noise and insulation spewing all over the place and will the oven please just pre-heat already because imhungryandeverythingisfrozenbecausewhatthehellisthisthearctic?!
I've never put too much thought into patience because, well, that would take too much time, but there seems to be something to it that often yields better results than I typically produce. I have been witness to the benefits of passing time and admire the virtue of tenacity, but up until this year I was fairly convinced that I did not hold such capacity. But now that it is the bleak midwinter and the survival of my limbs/those of my friends depends on our ability to spend hours of time putting up this damn window plastic, I am starting to believe that maybe I have it in me after all.
I think I can do this. The whole process without immediate results thing. We'll start with the plastic wrap and if that endeavor yields warmth, I'll try something bigger. Because, as planet earth has taught me, survival and (more importantly) life requires it.
I want to feel my fingertips again. I want to be a vessel that can hold heat and warmth again. And lawdy this patience thing is taking up the most of my time! But I live in this dwelling and the story goes on. Muddled mixed metaphors aside, there's that.
And I have an awesome sleeping bag, so there's that, too.
Our house is an icebox. Something about the hole in the ceiling that lets all the warm air escape, the single-paned windows, the lack of insulation in century old walls. Go figure. Try as we might with electric blankets, space heaters, fireball, winter coats, dancing, cuddles and literal house-warming parties of 40+ and soup, we just can't seem to get the place above 54 degrees. I am tempted to buy a pair of heat-vision goggles just to marvel at the lack of vision they would provide. Alas, this would be a waste of money that I do not have to phenomenize something that really just sucks. So for now, I just pretend to have said heat-vision goggles by closing my eyes because it seems to be the cheapest and most comparable alternative.
When you live in a house, you start to fill it up with useless items (see--many slug-covered couches in the basement, knicknackspaddywhacks, tchotchkes, do-hickys, randomcrap, junk, treasuretroves, wtf is this?! ). It is a well known fact. What is less well known is the fact that when you live in a dwelling, you start to take on the characteristics of said abode. Sort of like how married couples become indistinguishable after 60 years of marriage, or the way that people often resemble their pets.
Keeping in the same vein, it has recently come to my attention that just like Rayegrey, I too am in pursuit of warmth. I am in a season of patching windows and sealing doors and hanging thick drapes and insulating the walls because when it comes down to it I am literally and metaphorically tired of paying for heat that doesn't last. And yeah I want to be comfortable but some work has to be done first to insulate the extremities of this lovely wreck of a house.
This all involves--
Patience. Gah! Patience kills me. It involves lots of over-sized Saran wrap and hair-driers and contractors coming in and making noise and insulation spewing all over the place and will the oven please just pre-heat already because imhungryandeverythingisfrozenbecausewhatthehellisthisthearctic?!
I've never put too much thought into patience because, well, that would take too much time, but there seems to be something to it that often yields better results than I typically produce. I have been witness to the benefits of passing time and admire the virtue of tenacity, but up until this year I was fairly convinced that I did not hold such capacity. But now that it is the bleak midwinter and the survival of my limbs/those of my friends depends on our ability to spend hours of time putting up this damn window plastic, I am starting to believe that maybe I have it in me after all.
I think I can do this. The whole process without immediate results thing. We'll start with the plastic wrap and if that endeavor yields warmth, I'll try something bigger. Because, as planet earth has taught me, survival and (more importantly) life requires it.
I want to feel my fingertips again. I want to be a vessel that can hold heat and warmth again. And lawdy this patience thing is taking up the most of my time! But I live in this dwelling and the story goes on. Muddled mixed metaphors aside, there's that.
And I have an awesome sleeping bag, so there's that, too.
Friday, November 30, 2012
"I Love You", a love poem.
I love you so much that I would let you borrow some of my stuff that has sentimental value.
I love you so much that if we had to park in a space that was 2 hours only and we were going to be out for 4, I would volunteer to move the car. Except if it was raining. Probably not then.
I love you so much that I will tell you after I eat some of your food without asking and offer to buy you more the next time I go shopping.
I love you so much I would never let you have a chunk of salad stuck in your teeth without staring at you pointedly until you flossed.
I love you so much I will think twice about throwing that perfect snowball at the back of your head the next time it snows.
I love you so much I would give you a wet willie and then offer you a q-tip.
I love you so much I will write you a lame poem now while I am procrastinating.
I love you so much I will try extra hard not to snot on your sleeve so much when I cry.
I love you so much that you can have the last box of Oreo cookies.
I love you so much that we can keep pretending you would be in Gryffindor even though we both know you are Hufflepuff material.
I love you so much that when you need chocolates I'll walk to Theo's with you and crawl back with you when we eat too many samples.
I love you so much that if you were Frodo and I was Sam I would carry you to the top of the mountain even if you were really heavy and most likely complaining.
I love you so much that I would even offer to carry the ring and only put it on a couple of times just to try it out.
I love you so much that I'll try to make that face that you hate less often or at least not when you are around.
I love you so much that every night, I want you to hold Marvin the cat.
I love you so much that I am going to stop prosing and finish my paper so we can hang out.
yeah. I love you all that much.
I love you so much that if we had to park in a space that was 2 hours only and we were going to be out for 4, I would volunteer to move the car. Except if it was raining. Probably not then.
I love you so much that I will tell you after I eat some of your food without asking and offer to buy you more the next time I go shopping.
I love you so much I would never let you have a chunk of salad stuck in your teeth without staring at you pointedly until you flossed.
I love you so much I will think twice about throwing that perfect snowball at the back of your head the next time it snows.
I love you so much I would give you a wet willie and then offer you a q-tip.
I love you so much I will write you a lame poem now while I am procrastinating.
I love you so much I will try extra hard not to snot on your sleeve so much when I cry.
I love you so much that you can have the last box of Oreo cookies.
I love you so much that we can keep pretending you would be in Gryffindor even though we both know you are Hufflepuff material.
I love you so much that when you need chocolates I'll walk to Theo's with you and crawl back with you when we eat too many samples.
I love you so much that if you were Frodo and I was Sam I would carry you to the top of the mountain even if you were really heavy and most likely complaining.
I love you so much that I would even offer to carry the ring and only put it on a couple of times just to try it out.
I love you so much that I'll try to make that face that you hate less often or at least not when you are around.
I love you so much that every night, I want you to hold Marvin the cat.
I love you so much that I am going to stop prosing and finish my paper so we can hang out.
yeah. I love you all that much.
Monday, November 19, 2012
Restless.
I walk. I talk. I shop. I sneeze.
I'm gonna be a fireman when the floods roll back.
There's trees in the desert since you moved out,
and I don't sleep on a bed of bones.
Monday, October 1, 2012
shake the death away!
I think I was born in the fall to learn how the trees relinquish their treasures.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)